So the plan was not for me to go back to work. I was going to be stay at home mommy...something I've always wanted to be since Taryn was born. After Toby was born I had second thoughts (like I must be out of my mind, and will I ever shower again??)...and apparently so did God. Calvin lost his job when Toby was 2 weeks old. Yikes. How quickly life can change. My first reaction was devastation and of course, fear. What are we going to do now? Haven't we had enough trials these past 3 years???? I think we've grown enough, Lord...how about taking it easy on us for awhile????!! However, the blessings slowly but surely revealed themselves. First, I got mastitis 3 times in a row. If you've ever had it you know it knocks you on your butt. Basically you feel like you have the flu and it's horrible, not to mention the fact that you just had a baby, are absolutely exhausted, and have to function regardless. So how convenient that my wonderful husband, yes again with the cheese factor, was home to help me through it. He got up with Toby every night for almost 2 weeks. Blessing. Bu-lessing! By the way, anyone who nurses their babies for the long haul deserves an award. Not even just an award but maybe an award ceremony like the Emmy's for breastfeeding. I don't know but I couldn't do it. So the plan changed...mommy's going back to work. Which at that point I was secretly excited about. And I think my husband was too. I think he had a picture of me in sweatpants and combing my hair like once a week. Well, at the beginning of my maternity leave, that was pretty much the truth. Anyway, 2 weeks before I'm scheduled to go back he started a new job that he absolutely loves. BLESSING. Except that meant finding daycare. SCARY! And then God brought the most perfect daycare provider I could possibly ask for. She did daycare for one of my coworkers whose girls are grown and also has another coworker's son right now. Perfect. Blessing!!! (I sang it that time in opera voice in case you were wondering.) I have now made it through day 2 of my back to work adventure. It hasn't been easy for sure...I had a few tears after the first daycare drop off. But tonight I have a fresh perspective and just feel so....you guessed it...blessed. And my wonderful daycare mama hooked me up today with a pass to the Just Between Friends presale so I pretty much got fall/winter wardrobe for both kids for $114. Um, best deal ever. K I'm done ranting...for now...but I hope you all experience a little of God's amazing love for you even in the times that seem so difficult. Good night.
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