Power

There is something about severe weather that reminds me of the absolute power of God. He is bigger than all the eye can see. I am reminded of a couple years ago when the tornado hit my sister's house and she called me in hysterics, needing a place to go for the night. Miraculously no one was killed or injured, although Kayla had a close call. I don't know, I guess I just forget how awesome our God is, I mean awe - some. I stand in awe of Him today. Hope all made it safely through the storm.

Hmmmm....

Okay, so I've been reading through 1 Corinthians and there's a verse that has been bothering me. "just as I try to please everyone in everything I do, not seeking my own advantage, but that of many that they may be saved." (Ch. 10 vs.33) The NIV reads: "even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved." Reflecting on my life and my actions I am appalled. It seems that I have it all turned around because I am trying to please myself in most things and seeking my own good most of the time. Really. I am living in complete selfishness. At home: I try so hard to control everything my husband does so I can be happy, because if he does something I don't like, I become miserable. Therefore, I am quite sure this makes him miserable. It's all about me. What I want, how I want to spend, what I want to do, and how I want to do it. I am absolutely horrible to my mother-in-law, who is running back to Montana as fast as she can. This could have been an opportunity to grow close with her and share Christ with her. Instead it became: she doesn't cook right, she doesn't clean the way I like to, she talks too much when I want to be left alone, therefore there is now practically no relationship. I'm a selfish drill-sergeant. At work: I may get annoyed with certain customers. I may get annoyed with co-workers. I complain. These are just a few examples of my selfishness, but this just points to the fact that my whole walk is self-centered. Christ suffered and died a horrific death, while I WAS STILL A SINNER so I could be saved. Not because I earned it. Not because I was good enough and didn't annoy him too much. He poured out everything he was and had for the sake of others so that they may be saved. Can I live this way? Truly live this out? Can I forgive the unforgiveable? Can I pour out my life for others? Even the "unlikeable"? Wow. I am really pondering this and praying for Christ's transformation.

Love,
Jolene

This is the Day the Lord Has Made

What a day! I stuck to my one hour of TV (American Idol, heellllooo!)and it made such a huge difference in my outlook. I actually started my day reading the Word! Wow. It was pretty cool. I took Charlie for a walk and enjoyed the beauty of a spring dusk. Nothing like some fresh air. I love the smell of freshly cut grass...invigorating! Then after Taryn's bath I held her in my arms and prayed over her as I rocked her. Such a tender moment and I can't help but wonder how many of these I'm missing because I'm too enthralled in the boob tube! Anyway, it was a good day. I just pray that I continue to keep the TV shut off. Maybe I could challenge someone else to try it also. Or maybe I'm the only loser who has this problem. Oh well. Love to all!!!

TV...My Drug of Choice

Today has been one of those days that I get out of bed, change and feed the baby, and plop in front of my good old reliable television. I call it a lazy day. Except I seem to have a lot of those days when I don't have to work and my housework is done. Of course now I have a child to take care of and play with, I just do it in front of the TV. I become mesmerised by the drama that unfolds before me, no matter how trashy or ridiculous. Yes that's right. I'm one of those people that comes home from work, makes dinner, and sits in front of the TV until I go to bed. That's kind of embarrassing to admit. I wonder how many hours of my life have been wasted on this. So today I realized, as I sat on the edge of my recliner engrossed in Dr. Phil, that TV is my drug of choice. I am addicted to TV. Wow. That's a little sad. I wonder how many other people struggle with this, or just think its a normal way of life? Yuck. Watching TV is like checking out of life. Its mind numbing. I especially don't want to pass this down to my daughter. I think I'll start with a limit. One hour a day. It'll be tough, but I need to stop wasting my time. Let's see what happens! Anyway, my beautiful baby Taryn is really engaging socially now. She loves to smile and giggle, and she talks her gurgly baby talk. It's amazing to watch her change. I love to watch Calvin with her. He is so in love with his little girl. God is so good to us.